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Cowboy Cockroach Rescues Inebriated Ladybug Trapped In Snowy Footprint
A rough-and-tumble roach ropes up a drunken damsel in distress stuck in a child’s shoeprint.
Though the loaded lady will later make a smitten pass, the southerly water bug will politely decline, tip his ten-gallon kindly, and mosey on along.
The Cowboy Cockroach Post
#1: Gifting A Freeloading Kidney
SUBJECT: Cockroach and the bug
Please tell me you still have it !!!!!
MY REPLY:
[redacted], you’ll be happy to know that you are the first responder, with quite an impressive response time!
Also, that is almost an absurd number of exclamation points, which tells me you are either quite enthused about this drawing, or that you’re “1” key is starting to stick again.
I’m happy to see that my art has made an impression on you. Would you mind sharing what’s got you in such a tizzy?
My number 1 key has been replaced just last week along with all the keys that are used to spell “suck my dick, fucking bitch and peanut butter” as those are the ones I tend to use the most.
My response time is all because of luck. I felt my craigslist senses tingling and just knew that I would have a find tonight!
This picture speaks to me on so many levels! I feel like this piece of art will do nicely on the biggest and whitest wall of my house dead spank in the middle. Apart from being a GREAT conversation topic I will be glancing at it every time I go for a run for motivation. We all need a cowboy cockroach to pull as out from a child’s footprint sometimes, no matter what color our spots are.
Additional question: is his lasso made out of a shoe lace from the same shoe that made the print? Does cockroach have any relations with the lady bug or are they strangers? Where was the kid going?Can I consider this mine since I was the first to respond?
The sketch is yours for the having.
I say having, not taking, because taking implies a negative space will be left in its absence.
However, the abundance of joy you feel for this drawing is its own reward, not unlike offering an extra organ to a devoted friend who watched over your girl while you were deployed in Iraq and could have totally hit that while you were gone, but didn’t.
When going to a worthy recipient, gifting out a freeloading kidney is a gift in itself.
That being said, you have asked a great many questions about the drawing that you must explore for yourself. Sometimes the questions are more important than the answers. That, plus it would take more time to explain than my hankering for pad thai will allow.
Over time, I hope you will grow to appreciate the ambiguity embedded in this depiction of bug altruism, rather than allowing its mysteries to assuage you from bringing it home.
You seem kind and critical, just the sort of person I’m sure my illustrious insect illustration yearned for as it was torn from my sketchbook.
[Follow-Up Email]
I have not heard from you in a little while.
Has my response left you in turmoil over whether to accept the illustration? Someone else in also inclined to receive it, so let me know if you’ve reconsidered inviting this enigma into your home.
My apologies for delinquency in response! I still would like to adopt this piece into my house and make it a home for your art. I’ve been great deal busy with life and such that I forgot to respond :/ I feel like it would be safe for me to give you my number for future communication [number redacted]
Feel free to text me for anything and lets set up a meeting so that I could take your kidney.
I would love for someone to read this out of context.
#2: Avoiding Verbosity
SUBJECT: Cowboy Cockroach Rescues Inebriated Ladybug Trapped In Snowy Footprint
Nice!
MY REPLY:
Thank you for the kind words. Or word. Regardless, THANK YOU!
#3: Fresh From The Loins
SUBJECT: Cowboy Cockroach Rescues Inebriated Ladybug Trapped In Snowy Footprint
When’s the best time to pick this baby up?
MY REPLY:
I sincerely appreciate the apt term for my work. It is indeed my baby: fresh from the loins of my fertile mind.
Unfortunately this fine specimen is already spoken for. However, the person hasn’t picked it up yet, so there’s always a chance they’ll lose their taste in fine art and it can be bequeathed to you.
If that happens, I’d be happy to hand over a print based off the original illustration.
Have a great evening and a Merry Christmas!
Gimme the deetz. I got a spot in my chateau already picked out for this beauty
The original recipient is a consummate dilly-dallier, and as such, has forfeited his/her rights to the original sketch. This is unprecedented territory, as the mind reels from allowing simple negligence to cause one to be bereft of such a cherished national treasure.
And now, your chateau shall reap the benefits of another’s folly.
Congratulations!
In terms of picking up the precious parcel, I am near [redacted]. Would you be able to meet there? Also, would you like the illustration signed?
The only real explanation is unfortunately a sad one. He must have met an untimely end. Rest in Peace fellow art adorer. However, his loss is my gain. I can hit that stop at some point next week most likely, but no sooner than that. Are you also in BK somewhere too though? I live right near the [redacted] Museum (where this piece belongs). Let me know. We will make it happen regardless.
And fuck yeah I want it signed
You should know that although I like hearing excitement, I love hearing profane excitement. The [redacted] Museum was not contacted.
All my base are belong to us.
[Follow-Up Email]
Haven’t heard from you yet... Are my bugs destined to be deserted?
Shit! Sorry man. Drank too much wine, much like the ladybug. My day is now filled tomorrow (un)fortunately with work. What does Sat look like? I will have a car that day. And to be quite honest, I really do want to come get this masterpiece. So if we had to wait til next week, you got my word I would find a day to do it. Bug's honor.
The Email Responses
